Understanding Your True Challenge

An Introduction to UpToParents

What is UpToParents?

3 Girls' Invisible Pain

7 Lessons from These 3 Girls

  1. Kids need and want some simple things, like courteous communication between their parents.
  2. No matter how small the topic (birthdays, holidays, pickups, etc.), parent fights leave kids badly hurt.
  3. Kids don't want one parent to win the fight; kids want one parent to stop the fight.
  4. Kids almost never care about the things we parents are fighting about; they just want the fights to stop.
  5. When parents fight, kids' real needs can become invisible.
  6. Kids experience attacks between their parents as attacks on them.
  7. Parent fights can force kids to try to resolve adult issues - and to blame themselves when they fail.

What Must I Give Up to Succeed?

The one huge price you must pay to succeed.

Finishing Your Grieving: A Key to Life After Divorce

Divorce represents the death of a marriage and all the hopes and dreams that went into it. And the death of a marriage, like any death, requires a grieving process for healing.

Yeah, But You Don't Know My Co-Parent!

How your peaceful leadership can make all the difference.

Putting That Understanding to Work Today

Better Use of Your Energies

Some things to do instead of battling.

Nix Six/Fix Six

Pocket Guide to Co-Parenting Success

Child Safety Zone Pledge

The simple reason your children need never see or hear a fight.

Inviting in Your Co-Parent

Bonnie & Ross

A young couple's journey to making their son their priority.

What Exactly Is Joint Legal Custody?

A judge's explanation of a vital, but often misunderstood idea.

Joint Legal Custody Handout

In Joint Legal Custody, separated and divorced parents make the major decisions concerning their children's upbringing in the same cooperative way that happily married parents do.

The Law, You, and Your Family

A Judge's View on What Happens to Litigating Parents

An experienced judge's caution on how litigation actually affects parents and parenting.

How Do Divorce Lawyers Divorce?

An inside lesson from copying how lawyers handle their own divorces.

Stacy Prall: Attorney, Parent, and Voice for UpToParents.org

An attorney describes what UpToParents meant in her own divorce—and can mean for others.

Special Resources and Insights

Divorce and the Very Young Child

Young children are more aware than we realize.

Divorce and Older Children

Their family will always matter to them.

Sample of UpToParents Commitments
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